Series Communicating with your ex Part 1

Ive been thinking lately about how people communicate with their exes.

For the most part, people dont. Exceptions are when they work together, have classes together, go to church together, etc.

Another exception is when one of the partners wants to get back together. Usually, if someone wants to get an ex back, there will be communication. In fact, there may be all too much communication.

The last exception arises when a couple has children. Here is an article I found, about communicating in that situation. -- Kit.

Communicating With Your Ex - Letting Go of the Last Word

By Mary Wollard

You probably all have someone in your family who has to have the last word in any discussion or argument. Maybe your whole family is like this, making family get-togethers challenging at best. In the case of email, this can lead to back-and-forth messages that belabor a subject way longer than necessary, with each new message escalating the conflict higher and higher.

If you are someone who needs to have the last word and your communications with your ex are difficult, be aware that this is only adding to the conflict. It will take great restraint on your part to break the pattern. After all, it took a long time to cultivate the need to have the last word and it will take a long time to feel comfortable not having the last word. The only way to break the cycle is to just resist the urge to say one more thing.

Start with a conversation that you feel neutral about, and just try not responding to the last thing the other person said. As you become more comfortable with this in relatively unimportant conversations, then you can move on to practicing in areas that are more important. Work slowly, but work at it constantly. It will be hard work because this is a very hard habit to break, but the rewards will be great.

If it is the other parent who needs the last word, know that it is not a sign of weakness on your part to let him or her have it. Know that this communication pattern in the other person started way before you ever came into the picture and likely affects every relationship they have. But you can still take responsibility for your part in these never-ending discussions.

Even if the other person hasnt yet done the work necessary to end this communication merry-go-round, you can. If you follow the steps above, the cycle will stop. Start with a subject that is not highly charged, and just let the conversation go when you have said what you have to say.

The important thing is to make the decision to break this communication cycle. If you do, I guarantee you will feel more powerful in the relationship, not less powerful.

© 2009, Mary Wollard, J.D., Family Solutions Center, LLC

Mary A. Wollard, JD, is an attorney, mediator, and arbitrator with over 20 years experience in solving the legal issues of divorce, parenting (custody), marital property and support. In addition to helping families through mediation and arbitration, Ms. Wollard provides parenting coordination and decision-making services to families when on-going conflict prevents them from fully implementing their parenting plan after divorce. Visit http://www.cofamilysolutions.com/downloads.htm for free downloadable worksheets you can use to organize your familys transition.

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Mary_Wollard
http://EzineArticles.com/?Communicating-With-Your-Ex---Letting-Go-of-the-Last-Word&id=2193378

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Series continues with Part 2 and Part 3.
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Avoid Any “Awkward Silence” With This 1 Bizarre Trick

“I’ve heard this tragic story far too many times…”

You can feel this excruciating moment coming on from a mile away.

The conversation with this cute girl started off great. She’s smiling, laughing, clearly becoming more interested and more attracted as you continue.

Then…it happens.

Avoid Any “Awkward Silence”

awkward silenceCall it a brain fart, a blank mind, a loss for words. The only thing that matters is, it brings the conversation to a complete hault and you can feel her attraction levels for you dropping faster than a drunk girl in stilletos.

So what can you do to pull the conversational nose-dive back into the high flying interaction it was?

You dig into your toolbox. Your social toolbox, that is.

I’ll share with you my absolute favorite conversation-saving tool.

This is a guaranteed way to save any conversation with a girl, PLUS it’s so perfectly constructed, that it easily allows for sexual innuendo to get her mind “in the right place” while still being in the context of pure, NON-NEEDY and FUN banter.

It’s a little game I like to call “FMK” and it will be your new best friend.

When you deploy the FMK game, any drooping conversation will instantly be turned around.

You will leap beyond the average lame guys who approach her with the same old boring pickup lines and dull conversations.

>> Click here to visit the The Tao of Badass official site <<

So it goes like this:

When you start to run out of things to say, just as you can feel that her attraction is about to start dipping down…

You turn to her, and you say:

“Hey, let’s play a game real quick.”

Watch as her eyes sparkle with curiosity. This is a departure from the normal night-time drivel she’s used to dealing with. She will almost certainly invite you to proceed.

Continue to the game. Start to glance around the room, assessing the other guys you see and start to point them out one by one, and asking her “ok, so would you fuck, marry or kill him?”

She’ll laugh at first. Then she’ll look over at your target and size him up.

Choose different types of guys representing the spectrum of personality types and behaviors.

A jock. A douchebag. A nerd. A handsome debonair type. A bad-boy rocker. A business guy.

This will do a few things:

1) You will get an insight into what she values in a man, and how she operates. She will give very direct clues to how she wants to be seduced.

If she says “fuck” to the rocker dude, “marry” to the nerdy guy, and “kill” to the guy in a suit…then you can guess that she’s got a wild side, she doesn’t like guys with a lot of structure, and she’s a secret nerd.

Think about that… she’ll basically be giving you a HUGE hint into how to seduce her.

If you know the 4 things that every girl needs to know before she thinks about sleeping with a guy, it will pretty much be deal-closer.

More on that in a few…

2) You can continue bantering and teasing her. This is so crucial to the first stage of the interaction.

Keep conversation light, non-needy (teasing her playfully) and fun!

Make fun and silly projections about who you guess she’d fuck, marry and kill.

It will be remarkably easy as she’s alternating between giggling at her own qwerky tastes, cringing at the dopey guys, and switching to her “ooh la la” voice with the guys that turn her on.

3) Which brings me to my next point…SHE WILL GET TURNED ON.

Remember, you are asking her to bring the thought “who do I want to fuck?” into her mind, and all in the context of an experience that was generated by and shared with you…and only you.

4) Finally…she will see that you are 100% confident in your sexuality and your ability to attract women. You can confidently discuss the theoretical thought of her sleeping with other men, and that doesn’t threaten you.

99.99% of dudes would be terrified to even suggest that she even look at another guy when he’s talking to her!

Your confidence here will be very, very sexy to women.

After playing this game for even a few minutes, she will be extremely turned on by your creativity, your playfulness, and your confidence…

This sets you up PERFECTLY to transition into the next stage of interaction, build upon the sexual energy in this game, especially if you’ve been properly mixing in the right “sexual triggers” that all women have.

This is part of the 4 things that every girl needs to decide to sleep with a guy.

If you haven’t learned about the sexual triggers yet, stop everything and watch this presentation (this shit will change how you attract women forever!) :

Learn how to activate secret “sexual triggers” <— Get her instantly turned on

Cheers,

Joshua Pellicer

PS FMK is a great tool to have in your toolbox. There are several others that will absolutely make meeting women a breeze when you go out.

“The Free Drink Technique” and “The Kiss Technique” are a couple that changed my life forever when I discovered them.

Learn more about the sexual triggers, and these amazing secret tools in this free presentation:

[Illegal Seduction Techniques]: Discover these 4 secrets women will never reveal

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Happiness Enhancing Tips

By Laura Green

Hundreds of millions of people around the world suffer from symptoms of depression. Despite many efforts to curb these issues, our minds are simply too powerful to reverse themselves sometimes, and our chemical balances are out of our control.

The good news is that there are some things that you can naturally do to manipulate your happiness levels. None of these require taking medications, and none of them cost any money. Theyll simply require some commitment and a willingness to believe that theyll help.

First of all, exercise is an automatic catalyst in this regard. Few people realize this since it often seems like work, but the benefits of exercise couldnt be more clear.

Exercise causes a number of hormones to be distributed through your body, most notably endorphins. These are responsible for feelings of euphoria, almost acting as natural drugs.

You should also find activities that you really enjoy, as any hobbies will have a positive effect on your spirits. Not only will you enjoy your time spent on these hobbies, but theyll serve as a distraction to your otherwise negative feelings.

Think about your favorite things to do. Even if its just for a fleeting moment, theres a good chance that youre naturally more content with your life while youre doing those things. Embrace the concept of such a distraction.

What you eat is just as important as anything else, and your diet can definitely play a role in your overall mental and emotional demeanor. Eating foods loaded with sugars and starches gives you a temporary lift in spirits, followed by a much stronger crash. These should be avoided.

On the other side of the equation, eating natural foods like fruits and vegetables will provide your body with important nutrients that improve your attitude all around. Try it out consistently for a few weeks, and Im nearly certain youll notice the difference. - 30535

About the Author:

Read more articles by this author at her site about industrial automatic aluminum can crusher and soda can crushers.

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How To Attract Women – The Tao Of Badass

Most guys are useless with women.
They learn their swagger from random losers on television, their friends at school… and sometimes even their dad!
The truth is that women talk all the time to develop their own way of catching a guy, but this is not a conversation that a lot of men have.
So when you read our Tao of Badass review which follows, you’ll discover why this book is being hailed as revolutionary.
It will teach you how to put the control back in your hands. All the time. With every woman you desire.
It sounds too good to be true when you first hear it. Like your wildest fantasy come to life.
But, as history shows us time and time again, the best things in life belong to those who dare……

How To Attract Women – What Is the Tao of Badass?

The Tao Of Badass is a dating and social program developed by professional dating coach, Joshua Pellicer, who is known around the world as one of the experts in male-female relationships. He spent several years going through all the dating advice he could find online, and testing it all out in the real world.
Through years of research and vigorous testing, he developed a brutally effective system. A system that seemed to never fail. Any woman he wanted turned to putty in his hands.
The Tao of Badass is that system. Since it became publicly available, it has gained a die-hard fan base worldwide.
In fact, what he has to show you will put you in the top 2% of men, just by doing one simple thing…

>> Click here to visit the The Tao of Badass official site <<

How Does It Work?

The Tao of Badass program will take you through almost any situation with a woman or in a social setting and show you the way you are probably doing it right now… and how you’ll want to change that.
For instance, you will learn how to say just the right thing when a woman flirts with you… and how to get her attention when she doesn’t.
You learn how to take a girl away from a guy who is totally useless, and how to turn that friend of yours into a girlfriend.
The Tao of Badass also shows you that many of the fears you have about women are completely irrational. And when you learn how to overcome those fears, you’ll finally be able to get closer to meeting the right kind of woman or women, and have the relationship you’ve always wanted.
Another theory that you’ll learn in this program is that attracting women is a skill that you will get better at over time, and that by practicing it, you’ll soon reach the point where you are no longer actively pursuing women – they start pursuing you. It’s this life-changing shift that causes so many men to rave about The Tao of Badass.
You’ll also learn all the tell-tale signs that a woman is really interested in you and not just looking to add another friend to her list. It’s when you know you’ve succeeded in making her interested that you go in for the kill… How to attract women..

The Tao Of Badass official site : www.thataoofbadass.com

The Tao of Badass Download – What are the Downsides?

Many things humankind does are very methodical and routine, it happens the same way every time. However, humans are very complex creatures, women even more so. Those simple things that we can rely upon to repeat with success just are not the same when trying to apply them to a complex creature like a woman. It makes the most simple process unbearably difficult.

Everyone is drastically different in their day to day affairs. What has happened over the course of their day can affect every human interaction throughout. It can negatively impact a man’s approach to a woman before he’s even said or done a thing, so we view this simplicity of the program a bit of sales hype.

The last issue is the amount of material that you are expected to get through, memorize and apply. There’s the e-book itself, bonus reports, cheat sheets, flow charts, audio commentary, and a 5 week body language program. This is a serious investment of time, not money. It does require a major commitment to the effort being put into the system for it to work. It is not ideal for someone with a hectic lifestyle or who is pressed for time daily.

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What you get when you buy:

• The Tao of Badass e-book includes:
• Step by step process of falling in love for women
• Strategy and method to keep women from cheating
• Early signs that she’s “friend-zoned” you and how to reverse it
• The 3 step test women put you through subconsciously
• The 4 step process women use when making the decision to sleep with you
• The full set of sexual triggers
• Reading her body language and eye movements to gain insight to her thoughts
• Knowing the difference between Attractive, Positive, and Dominant body language
• How to speak to her emotionally to cause feelings of attraction
• Fail-safe way to avoid saying the “wrong” things
• A step by step flowchart to successful interaction as a visual guide
• How to approach a woman to create instant attraction
• You also get lifetime support, free to members.

Bonus Reports:

• Cheat Proof Yourself Report – a method to ensure that she only has eyes for you
• Escaping the “Friend Zone” – full of advanced techniques
• Dating Multiples – A guide on how to date multiple women at once, and ensure they love you for it. It includes ways to avoid cheating and lying, and obliterate jealousy
• Guide to Breaking up – Because sometimes it’s not going to work out. This details how to leave in a noble fashion, free of pain or suffering, and leave you on a friendship level
• Access to Tao, Members Only Private Community included for LIFE

Bonus Goodies:

• Banter Cheat Sheet – Guide to what to say when you first meet
• Module 1 of the “Hacking Attraction” course
• Discover You Skills Program – analyzes which of the 4 super skill sets you belong to, and how to utilize them to maximum benefit
• Audio Commentary to the main book
• Also, lifetime access to banter cheat sheet updates, because times change and so does what we say!

Bonus Programs:

World renowned body language mastery course, over a 5 week program that the author claims is one of the most effective programs ever found to turn on women.

Here’s what you need to do next… How to Attract Women..

Click here to visit the Tao of Badass website. It’s worth every penny to pick it up today. Trust me when I tell you that you’re about to become a happy camper. Your penis is going to thank you too!

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Need to fix procrastination problems before getting back together

I have to say, I recognize a bit of my own relationship in the one described below. Me -- the procrastinator. Except, anger aimed at me doesnt bother me too much. I can ignore it.

Still, the scenario below struck me as one that could become the reason why a couple breaks up. I can imagine "Paul" leaving because he cant deal with her anger, or "Andrea" leaving because shes tired of Paul letting her down.

And the author makes a great point -- if they dont figure out how to deal with these traits in themselves, theyre just going to shift their problems onto their next relationships.

They might as well learn to understand their problem, and solve it, and stay together.

So, whats relevant here for someone trying to get an ex back? Well, if you and your ex broke up for a reason similar to this, then this article will get you thinking about how to solve the problem, so you can get back together.

Control And Resistance - The Relationship Gremlins

Author: Margaret Paul, Ph.d.

"Im so sick and tired of Andreas anger and bossiness that Im about ready to leave this relationship," said Paul in our phone counseling session. "Everything has to be her way. Why cant she just keep her mouth shut? She is ruining this relationship. I hate her judgmentally. Every time she does this it casts a black cloud over our relationship and I end up feeling awful."

Paul and Andrea were in one of their typical power struggles. Paul tended to operate as an adolescent regarding household chores. If something needed to be done, he would say he would do it and then procrastinate to the point where Andrea would blow up. Then he would blame Andrea for her anger rather than take any responsibility for his resistance.

"Paul, how did you react when Andrea got angry and judgmental?"

"I got angry and tried to explain to her why I hadnt fixed the curtain rod yet. But she wouldnt listen to me so then I withdrew."

"So Andrea is trying to control you with her anger and you are trying to control her with your explanations and withdrawal. And you are very determined to resist being controlled by her. So, do you want to complain to me about Andrea and blame your feelings on her anger, or do you want to understand your end of this system and learn about what you can do differently?"

"I just want her to stop being angry."

"Paul, you have been trying to have control over Andreas anger for the whole five years of your relationship. Is it working?"

"No. But why cant she just stop?"

"Well, why cant you just stop resisting and become responsible in the household and responsible for your own feelings instead of being a victim of Andrea?"

"Oh. I see what you mean. She must be as unconscious of what she is doing as I am of what I am doing."

"Right. The two of you learned very early in life to try to control and resist being controlled, and these old patterns are governing your relationship. But what is the point of leaving? You will each take your patterns with you and you will each end up in similar relationships, as you have in the past. So why not recognize that you are not a victim and address your issues?"

"Okay. So what do you see as my issues?"

"I see two major issues. I know that household things, such as the broken curtain rod, dont bother you, but they do bother Andrea. You put her in a bind, because when she says she will hire someone to fix the things that need fixing, you get upset and tell her you will do it and then you dont. So one major issue is that it is more important to you to resist being controlled than to be a caring person to yourself and to her. I am not excusing Andreas anger and judgmentally - that is her end of the system. But you have not accepted that you have no control over her anger. This is the other major issue for you - your lack of acceptance over your lack of control over her. She tries to control you and you resist while trying to control her.

"If you really want things to change, then the only control you have is over changing you, not over her changing. When you are ready to make caring about yourself and her more important than resisting, then things may change."

This is a huge challenge for a person who has been in resistance his whole life. Once Paul stops blaming Andrea, then he can do the deep work of healing his resistance.

About the Author:Margaret Paul, Ph.D. best-selling author of eight books, and co- creator of the powerful Inner Bonding healing process. Visit her web site for a FREE Inner Bonding course: http://www.innerbonding.com mailto:margaret@innerbonding.com. Phone sessions available.

Article Source: ArticlesBase.com - Control And Resistance - The Relationship Gremlins
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Goldman Analyst Compares GMAT Prep Programs Part 1

By Zeke Lee

So Paul, a Goldman Sachs analyst and student who recently logged into the GMATPill.com messaged me offering to help others learn about the GMAT Pill based on his relatively positive experience with the videos in the first few days. Prior to coming to GMAT Pill, he enrolled in the ManhattanGMAT program and viewed Kaplan and Princeton Review resources. Ultimately, he finds the most value in the GMAT Pills thought-process driven approach.

GMATPill: Hello everybody! Guide weve Paul with us here at the GMATPill.com. Paul, Welcome!

Paul: Hey, Zeke! Thanks for having me on.

GMATPill: Paul, youve actually been a member of gmatpill.com for just some days ago, isnt that right?

Paul:Yea. I actually signed up a couple days ago so Ive been a member for about 5 days.

So I am class of 06, University of Connecticut. I graduated and I went to work in New York. I worked at Goldman Sachs & Company.

Presently I am looking at school and would like to take my GMAT. I stumbled upon the GMATPill on Google as I was just thinking about different test prep companies. Ive actually done Manhattan GMAT-paid about $1500-$1600 dollars for it. But after taking the class and going through the film recordings I only felt like-I went through the books-I felt like most it was no very effective. I was searching for something else so I found the GMATPill and I was very impressed.

Copied I am thinking about school and would love to take my GMAT. First I did ManhattanGMAT--paid about $1500-$1600 for it. I took the class, went through the videos but felt some of it wasnt effective. So I looked approximately for something else and encountered the GMAT Pill--was quite impressed, needless to say.

GMATPill: Money youre a very person. Why is it that you wish to take time from your busy agenda to tell others about your GMAT Pill experience?

GMATPill: So you feel like they sort of got you into their basic program and they tried to upsell you on their private tutoring sessions.

Paul:Its generally a 12 session class and you sit in the first one. Its an introduction. Youre left with some basic concepts. You have to read the book. A many the terminology is very confusing. At the end of the day youre discovering terminology, youre discovering what logical predication is and youre studying these fancy terms-but you are aware when youre taking the exam-none of that is gonna be on there. You just have to know that this sentence correction looks wrong or this data sufficiency is insufficient. You do not have to know all these fancy terms. And second, youre paying a lot. To your point about upselling-yea, they normally leave you kind of hanging at the conclusion. These firms are incentivized for you to not fully understand the material cuz then youll need to go back and buy additional material and get more tutoring.

GMATPill:You mentioned before your experience so far with the GMAT Pill is better and you mentioned pricing. Can you walk into some more detail what other areas you feel its better in? Of your money theres a pricing component-its only a fraction of what the market- not only Manhattan GMAT-but what the marketplace charges. But what other aspects do you see specifically makes your experience better so far?

Paul:I think what they are trying to teach you is-they really try to drill into the material. Its so academic that most people who are troublesome to get this done and over with-its not time efficient, lets just say that. So let me give you example of why GMAT Pill is effective. If you go to a Manhattan GMAT class, they will talk to you about theory. Thinks about communicate with you about all these different things that you must dont overlook. You take into account 7-8 different things you need to dont forget every time you observe a test question. Its the same with Kaplan and Princeton Review-Ive used the books. With GMAT Pill- the important thing is you realize his mindset. You can read all these books-and most people will not ever get there-will never get to that mindset. Zeke plainly figured out the way to crack the GMAT and if you sit through sufficient of these video- theres plenty on the site-you begin to think like Zeke.

GMATPill:So you feel like the academic approach versus the thought procedure that I show students through these film footage-the thought process is actually better than the academic rigor that the other programs walk you through.

GMATPill:So you feel as if the academic approach versus the thought procedure that I show students through these film recordings-the thought process is actually superior to the academic rigor that the other programs walk you through.

[continued] - 30535

About the Author:

This article was authored by online GMAT prep tutor, Zeke Lee. Zeke is the inventor of The GMAT Pill Study Method and has assisted numerous students ace the GMAT exam in as little time as possible. Although his secret techniques were limited to wealthy students who could pay $200/hour a few years ago, Zeke has now opened the door to his special strategies to the average student. Online GMAT Prep

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